You had one job

This WashPost article is unintentionally hilarious: "Secret Service reviews White House security after fence-jumper enters mansion."

The Secret Service on Saturday launched a security review to learn how a man carrying a knife was able to get inside the front door of the White House Friday night after jumping a fence and sprinting more than 70 yards across the North Lawn — the first time that has ever happened.

Conclusion of security review: the Secret Service sucks.  Everybody start counterfeiting: nobody's on guard.

Side note: jumping a fence + 70 yards!  Unless this was Usain Bolt, this was an embarrassingly long time to respond to an intruder.